{"id":21953,"date":"2020-01-13T10:00:04","date_gmt":"2020-01-13T10:00:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/?p=21953"},"modified":"2020-01-13T10:00:04","modified_gmt":"2020-01-13T10:00:04","slug":"how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/","title":{"rendered":"How to design a culture of listening"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>When asked to picture a leader, people tend to think of someone giving an inspiring speech in front of a crowd, or perhaps someone barking orders to a frenzied team. But real leadership often requires just the opposite: quiet, reflective listening. Listening helps build relationships, solve problems, ensure understanding, resolve conflicts, and improve accuracy. And it <a href=\"http:\/\/sgr.sagepub.com\/content\/29\/4\/452.abstract\">leads to advancement<\/a>: listening skills are one of the ways people spot future leaders.<\/p>\n<p>If we\u2019re honest with ourselves, though, most of us can\u2019t claim that we listen well consistently. In fact, <a href=\"http:\/\/onlinelibrary.wiley.com\/doi\/10.1111\/j.1460-2466.1951.tb00110.x\/abstract\">forgetting is par for the course<\/a><strong>: <\/strong>we forget half to a third of all information within eight hours after hearing it for the first time. And despite the benefits of a listening culture, few companies encourage listening or reward dissent. At NOBL, many of our clients have asked us how to change this behaviour and develop a culture of listening at every level.<\/p>\n<h2>Listen on a deeper level<\/h2>\n<p>First, it\u2019s critical to realise that not all listening is created equal. Most of the time, people listen for information \u2014 how will what is being said affect <em>me<\/em>? But a strategic listener goes deeper to build a connection with the person they\u2019re listening to.<\/p>\n<style type=\"text\/css\">\n.tg  {border-collapse:collapse;border-spacing:0;}\n.tg td{font-family:Arial, sans-serif;font-size:14px;padding:10px 5px;border-style:solid;border-width:1px;overflow:hidden;word-break:normal;border-color:black;}\n.tg th{font-family:Arial, sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:normal;padding:10px 5px;border-style:solid;border-width:1px;overflow:hidden;word-break:normal;border-color:black;}\n.tg .tg-18eh{font-weight:bold;border-color:#000000;text-align:center;vertical-align:middle}\n.tg .tg-xwyw{border-color:#000000;text-align:center;vertical-align:middle}\n<\/style>\n<table class=\"tg\">\n<tr>\n<th class=\"tg-xwyw\"><\/th>\n<th class=\"tg-xwyw\"><\/th>\n<th class=\"tg-xwyw\"><span style=\"font-style:italic\">\u201cI made a presentation today and it didn\u2019t go over well.\u201d<\/span><\/th>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"tg-18eh\">Level<\/td>\n<td class=\"tg-xwyw\"><span style=\"font-weight:700\">Response<\/span><\/td>\n<td class=\"tg-xwyw\"><span style=\"font-weight:700\">What it sounds like<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"tg-18eh\">1<\/td>\n<td class=\"tg-xwyw\">Not listening (redirecting to self)<\/td>\n<td class=\"tg-xwyw\">\u201cOh, was that in the marketing meeting?<br \/> Yeah, I hate that meeting.\u201d<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"tg-xwyw\"><span style=\"font-weight:bold\">2<\/span><\/td>\n<td class=\"tg-xwyw\">Paraphrasing, clarifying (drawing the person out)<\/td>\n<td class=\"tg-xwyw\">\u201cOh! So sorry to hear it. What happened?\u201d <br \/><span style=\"font-style:italic\">Alt<\/span>: \u201cWhat made it bad?\u201d <br \/><span style=\"font-style:italic\">Alt<\/span>: \u201cTell me more.\u201d<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"tg-18eh\">3<\/td>\n<td class=\"tg-xwyw\">Going below the surface (addressing the emotion<br \/>contained in the statement \u2014 <br \/>without immediately trying to change it)<\/td>\n<td class=\"tg-xwyw\">\u201cWow, it sounds like you are feeling really disappointed \u2014<br \/>and understandably so! I know how hard you worked on it.\u201d<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019re just starting to improve your listening skills \u2014 that is, moving to the second level \u2014 the first step is to make sure you\u2019re truly understanding what the other person is saying. Try paraphrasing what you heard from the speaker, starting with a phrase such as, \u201cSo if I heard you correctly, what you just said was\u2026\u201d. If you find it hard to stay focused while listening, imagine you are going to have to repeat, from memory, the exact last sentence the person said.<\/p>\n<p>Once you\u2019ve mastered that skill, you can find more ideas from Julian Treasure, who discusses five ways to listen better in this <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ted.com\/talks\/julian_treasure_5_ways_to_listen_better?language=en\">brilliant video from TEDGlobal 2011<\/a><\/strong>. He warns us about \u201closing our listening\u201d since we have so many distractions around us. As a result, we struggle to consciously listen, which leads to understanding. To counteract this, try beginning each day with three minutes of silence to \u201creset\u201d your ears to quiet.<\/p>\n<h2>Listening when you don\u2019t want to hear it<\/h2>\n<p>Listening gets even harder when someone is sharing information you <em>don\u2019t<\/em> want to hear, like critical feedback or bad news. It\u2019s hard to hear without getting defensive. If we <em>don\u2019t<\/em>, though, we lose out on the opportunity to improve how we are being received \u2014 and that\u2019s critical for developing as a leader. To listen more actively instead of shutting down, try the following:<\/p>\n<h3>Don\u2019t shoot the messenger<\/h3>\n<p>We often end up venting our anger at the person who is giving us the bad news \u2014 especially if they are a subordinate or other \u201csafe\u201d person. But if you indulge that whim, you\u2019ll create a culture where no one wants to be the bearer of bad news, and it will keep you from hearing about things early enough to fix them.<\/p>\n<h3>Assume positive intent<\/h3>\n<p>Adopt the mindset that the person sharing this information is doing so to help \u2014 even if they might not have positive intent.<\/p>\n<h3>Focus on the facts<\/h3>\n<p>Our minds often run ahead to the worst-case scenario. Repeat the facts to yourself, so that you don\u2019t make mountains out of molehills.<\/p>\n<h3>Keep it impersonal<\/h3>\n<p>Make the discussion about the work or the action, not your identity, and ask for more detail so you have a clearer picture of the situation.<\/p>\n<h3>Don\u2019t litigate<\/h3>\n<p>Hear them out. If you disagree with the feedback or information, thank them and tell them you\u2019re going to think about it. Allow yourself time to cool off before deciding whether what to do next.<\/p>\n<h3>Gather more data<\/h3>\n<p>Ask a few people whose opinion you trust if there\u2019s merit to this feedback before dismissing it.<\/p>\n<h3>Stay focused on what you can do about it<\/h3>\n<p>Finally, avoid the temptation to search for a root cause. Instead, focus on fixes.<\/p>\n<h2>Instilling good team listening habits<\/h2>\n<p>While some companies have opened up a <a href=\"https:\/\/blog.namely.com\/blog\/2016\/12\/14\/the-power-of-becoming-a-chief-listening-officer\">Chief Listening Officer<\/a> role, we\u2019ve found that there are a few simple principles that anyone can implement to encourage a culture of listening:<\/p>\n<h3>Tell the truth<\/h3>\n<p>Nothing makes people tune out faster than jargon, hot air, and dishonesty. If you want others to listen carefully to what you have to say, make sure you\u2019ve given them good reasons to believe you. A culture of real listening can only be founded on trust and honesty. <a href=\"https:\/\/academy.nobl.io\/radical-candor\/\">Encourage transparency starting at the very top.<\/a><\/p>\n<h3>Interrupt interrupting<\/h3>\n<p>Many teams are in the habit of interrupting each other \u2014 breaking out their own ideas before others are finished speaking. We find this happens the most in boisterous, creative areas like marketing and innovation. It can feel exciting and fun, but it\u2019s also a habit that keeps people from feeling like their ideas matter. When people cut each other off, each person has to fight louder to be heard by any means necessary.<\/p>\n<p>To combat this, use a talking stick \u2014 a fun object that gives the holder the floor. At first, people will speak <em>longer <\/em>because they aren\u2019t used to having the time they need. But as they realise that they aren\u2019t being cut off, they\u2019ll embrace brevity. If you don\u2019t want to use a physical object, you can also designate a facilitator to call on people.<\/p>\n<h3>Round \u2018em up<\/h3>\n<p>Instead of having an open debate, have a \u201creaction round\u201d: around the table, each person, in turn, gives their perspective on the topic of discussion, with no back and forth. This helps people hear what is being said, instead of jockeying for their turn to speak.<\/p>\n<h3>Try \u201cconsent\u201d decision making<\/h3>\n<p>Get clearer on the purpose of the meeting and exactly what you need to decide on. Ask \u201cIs this safe to try?\u201d instead of \u201cDo I totally support this?\u201d This keeps debate to a minimum and focuses on the issue at hand.<\/p>\n<p>Building a culture of listening will not only make you more persuasive, but it will also help you navigate volatile emotions and cultivate collaboration across your organisation. When we listen to one another, our teams are more productive and efficient. As pioneering management consultant Margaret Wheatley says:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>\u201cListening is such a simple act. It requires us to be present, and that takes practice, but we don&#8217;t have to do anything else. We don&#8217;t have to advise, or coach, or sound wise. We just have to be willing to sit there and listen.\u201d\u00a0<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><strong><em>Also check out Lauren Currie\u2019s other business posts on the Heart Internet blog: <\/em><\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/designing-a-culture-of-confidence\/\"><strong><em>Designing a culture of confidence<\/em><\/strong><\/a><strong><em>, <\/em><\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/do-more-of-what-matters-managing-your-workload-while-maintaining-your-sanity\/\"><strong><em>Managing your workload while maintaining your sanity<\/em><\/strong><\/a><strong><em>, and <\/em><\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/go-the-distance-working-better-with-remote-teams-and-clients\/\"><strong><em>Working better with remote teams and clients<\/em><\/strong><\/a><strong><em>.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Listening helps build relationships, solve problems, ensure understanding, resolve conflicts, and improve accuracy. Learn how to create a culture of listening.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":21957,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-21953","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-your-business"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to design a culture of listening - Heart Internet<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"How to design a culture of listening - Written by the team at Heart Internet.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How to design a culture of listening - Heart Internet\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"How to design a culture of listening - Written by the team at Heart Internet.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Heart Internet\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/heartinternet\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-01-13T10:00:04+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/people-talking-with-coffee.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1100\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"733\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Eliot Chambers-Ostler\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@heartinternet\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@heartinternet\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Eliot Chambers-Ostler\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Estimated reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"6 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Eliot Chambers-Ostler\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/heartblog.victory.digital\/#\/schema\/person\/58ed7f27cc0f3ab6e69135742a5eee28\"},\"headline\":\"How to design a culture of listening\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-01-13T10:00:04+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/\"},\"wordCount\":1233,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/heartblog.victory.digital\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/people-talking-with-coffee.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Your Business\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.heartinternet.uk\/blog\/how-to-design-a-culture-of-listening\/\",\"name\":\"How to design a culture of listening - 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